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Free Book Reviews Blogoversary Interview: Arshad Ahsanuddin |Free Book Reviews

Monday, February 4, 2013

Blogoversary Interview: Arshad Ahsanuddin

During all of 2012 I was so busy with life that I was unable to pay any real attention to my blog and it’s purpose. I still made posts but not with the fervor of the prior year. Now that I am coming up on my anniversary of starting this blog and my life has become somewhat less cluttered I can start to give it a little more attention. I wanted to kick off this year with something new and fun but I also wanted a chance to give authors a way to shout out to readers. This blogs last anniversary I tried to get authors to give away a digital copy of their book and saw some success with that. However this year I do not want to just have authors giving away books to entice readers into checking them out. Therefore, I invite authors to host me on their blog, website or venue to ask me any questions they feel like asking. I would also like it if they would gift one copy of their paperback to the first person to comment on that post. If there are any authors that would like to participate that would be awesomesauce. But wait there is more. Below you will find some crazy questions that I would like to present to those authors willing to host me. Please copy and paste these questions, answer them and then email it as an attachment to me at arobbins 78 @ gmail dot com. Along with the questions provide me with all the links you can imagine and an excerpt of your book if you would like. Don’t be bashful, the world already knows you are crazy, that is why you write books anyway. After I get the answers to the below I will post them in the order received.

Today I bring you a fracking Canuck.

Take it away Arshad Ahsanuddin

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If we are supposed to be red with anger, would a Smurf turn purple?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
It would more likely turn a shade of Smurfy.

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How many times do you use the word “at” in your latest book?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
308.

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You are endowed with the job of creating one word to describe all human emotions in one word. What word would you create and why?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
“pettilime” - both petty and sublime.

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If our time is “my time” plus “your time” then why do we not get twice as much time to complete a task together?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
Tachyons have imaginary mass. If you add two time periods, the tachyon mass would increase, and therefore given the same energy, its momentum would double and you crash through the combined period of time twice as fast.
And, yes, I know that explanation is bullshit.

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Make a sentence out of the following words. (it has to make sense)
a. Additional
b. Subjected
c. Silence
d. Scoundrel
e. Systematic

Arshad Ahsanuddin
A scoundrel’s silence is subjected to additional systematic scrutiny.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie-pop?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
Three.

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You walk into a bathroom and someone left a book laying there. What is the title and why?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
“Shit happens.” To remind you to wash your hands.

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You get abducted by aliens. Where do they take you and why?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
What, do you think they took me home again afterward? Why do you think I’m still here?

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You wake up somewhere strange completely naked. Why?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
Roofies?

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You have to give a deaf, dyslexic directions to your next book signing. How do you accomplish this?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
“Come with me, if you want to live.”

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Finish this joke. An aardvark, moose and platypus enter a bar…

Arshad Ahsanuddin
And are immediately shot, stuffed and mounted.
Moral: If you look different from everyone else, expect extraordinary reactions, whether positive or negative.

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Why is it that when people are asked what they would take with them to a deserted island, no one says “boat”?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
Because it’s probably deserted by virtue of its being far away or otherwise inaccessible from any other populated locations, or it would already have a McDonalds and a Starbucks on it.

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If the fans of Doctor Who are called “whovians” and Whos come from Whoville, are they one and the same?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
No. People from Whoville are “Whovillians,” not to be confused by Who villains, like Davros and the Master.

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You are allowed only one word from now on to use to describe everything. What word would you choose and why?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
Frack. Because, Feldercarb just sounds stupid.

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Does a Timex really take licking to keep on ticking?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
Only the special Timex Sex Toy line.

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How can Nationwide really be on everyone’s side?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
Because they’re generating a false sense of security while they prepare the way for the Elder Gods to reclaim the earth and enslave us all.

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You wake up in the kitchen, chocolate syrup and whipped crème everywhere. Explain yourself.

Arshad Ahsanuddin
“Honey, get back here. You missed a spot.”

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If Einstein is right and the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results, would that not make sex insane?

Arshad Ahsanuddin

Only if you equate sex and love. Sex has an entirely predictable and mechanical outcome. Love is a two-body quantum uncertainty equation with complex emotions.

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How much was that puppy in the window?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
The one with the raggedy tail? Don’t know, I went with the non-substandard model.

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Congrats, you made it to the last question. Why?

Arshad Ahsanuddin
Why the Frack not?


Now that you have finished the test you may proceed to hawking your wares. Please be kind and assault our imaginations with your words. For those who do not know it INDIE AUTHORS ROCK. For more things INDIE please visit IWU on Facebook.



Author Bio:
Arshad Ahsanuddin is a practicing hematopathologist, a physician who specializes in using microscopic and laboratory data to diagnose diseases of blood, bone marrow, and lymph nodes, such as leukemia and lymphoma. Yes, a blood doctor writing about vampires. The irony is not lost on him. For more information about Arshad, or for more information about the series, check out his website at http://pactarcanum.com and leave him some feedback.

Social Media:
Website: http://pactarcanum.com/
Blog: http://pactarcanum.com/blog/
Amazon Author Page: https://www.amazon.com/author/pactarcanum
Facebook Page: http://www.facebook.com/pactarcanum
Goodreads Profile: http://www.goodreads.com/pactarcanum
Twitter Handle: @pactarcanum

Book links:
Sunset (Pact Arcanum: Book One): http://www.amazon.com/Sunset-Pact-Arcanum-ebook/dp/B005SIXXB2
Print edition: http://www.amazon.com/Sunset-Pact-Arcanum-Volume-1/dp/1479199818
Video Trailer: http://youtu.be/zdvchNFqSu4





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